Jay Shetty & Paris Hilton ON The Real Story Behind the Headlines

How do you reclaim your narrative when the entire world thinks they already know your story?

In this On Purpose episode, Jay Shetty welcomed back Paris Hilton, American heiress, entrepreneur, artist, and media personality. In her newest documentary, Infinite Icon: A Visual Memoir, she recounted her evolution as a musician, from childhood aspirations through trauma, fame, and the release of her 2024 album. The documentary blends rare footage, family insights, and live performances.

In this conversation, Hilton shared with Jay Shetty the reality of living with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), her journey toward finding true love, and how motherhood has changed her.

A Trilogy of Healing

Since her last interview with Jay Shetty, Paris Hilton became a mother of two and moved into a new home. She describes the last couple of years as a period of self-discovery, and her healing journey is a trilogy that started with her documentary This Is Paris, continued with her memoir Paris: The Memoir, and culminated in her newest music documentary, Infinite Icon: A Visual Memoir. 

For Hilton, music has been a healing force throughout her life, especially in times of trauma and pain. When she first started in the 2000s, she felt underestimated, but now feels she has regained her voice and power and can show the world a side of herself that had remained hidden behind her public persona for decades.

Hilton told Jay Shetty that she found refuge in dance music, raves, and festivals, and was inspired by icons such as Madonna and Britney Spears. She even admitted to being obsessed with Britney's music because of the happiness and joy it brings to her.

According to Hilton, music is a powerful tool, capable of changing someone's mood or even life through a single lyric. The most significant song on her newest album is ADHD, written with Sia. When she proposed the idea to Sia, ADHD was a topic widely untackled. However, the song became an anthem for parents and children who once felt ashamed of the condition but, through its reframing, now saw it as a superpower.

ADHD Superpower

Parish Hilton opened up to Jay Shetty about her ADHD diagnosis, which she didn't fully comprehend until later in life. Growing up in the 90s, she would only hear about the bad connotation of the syndrome, which left many feeling ashamed to have it. In school, she struggled because although she wanted to study hard, she couldn't concentrate, lost her homework, and even failed tests. Now, she understands that traditional school systems are simply not built for ADHD minds.

Through her work with Dr. Hallowell, Paris Hilton learned to understand how her brain works. She admitted to Jay Shetty that ADHD is now her superpower, the source of her drive, creativity, and the million ideas that pop into her mind at any given moment. Although it comes with its struggles, ADHD allowed Hilton to think outside the box and take leaps she probably wouldn't have without it. Moreover, while boring tasks are a real struggle, hyperfocus is the opposite: ADHDers can get laser-focused on things that interest them, entering a high-level flow state where "the magic happens," as Hilton put it.

ADHD Sensitivity

Although ADHD comes with many strengths, it does have its fair share of challenges, too. Hilton opened up to Jay Shetty about her struggles with Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD), a common side effect of ADHD. She described it as an extreme sensitivity, where even slightly negative interactions can provoke physical pain, making the emotions feel ten times stronger than for ordinary people. Hilton admitted that RSD made her media scrutiny in the 2000s feel even more agonizing.

While many people may think wealthy people have a smooth and easy life, Paris Hilton noted that no amount of money can shield a person from the pain of being misunderstood. She told Jay Shetty that she developed deep empathy for others because she knew what it felt like to be misunderstood and judged, and the pain it caused. Her work often revolves around protecting others from the types of hurt and violations she endured.

Multifaceted Industry Pioneer

Paris Hilton admitted that her ADHD-driven brain has always pushed her to create her own lane rather than follow a traditional path. Many of her early career endeavors were misunderstood at the time, but eventually evolved into multi-billion-dollar industries. Jay Shetty finds it remarkable that her personal excitement for certain trends turned into global business sectors.

When Paris Hilton starred in The Simple Life in the early 2000s, her parents and agents warned her against the show because they didn't understand the concept of reality TV. But Hilton followed her intuition, and the show became a pioneer for an entire entertainment genre. She admitted to Jay Shetty that she is proud to have opened doors for others and that her early fashion choices are still being featured on mood boards and runways today. Hilton deeply appreciates being called the OG (Original Gangster) and being credited for people's own careers.

Tabloids Seeking Sales at All Costs

Paris Hilton discussed with Jay Shetty the cruel media environment of her youth; she recalls how tabloids would manufacture rumors about her to increase sales, often pitting women against each other. She was constantly followed by paparazzi, and a single photo taken with a stranger could spark false stories about her romantic life. This period was agonizing because fake news caused real fights in her actual relationships.

While the vast majority of tabloid content is fabricated, the general public still believes everything they read. Paris Hilton told Jay Shetty how difficult it was to be the subject of global discussion from an early age. However, she is thankful to her parents for being her rock; they knew the real her and didn't fall for the fake news circulating about their daughter. But not all her peers were as lucky – some of them who lacked real-life support ended up spiraling, some even losing their lives.

Shame the Abuser, Not the Victim

Paris Hilton opened up to Jay Shetty about the release of her sex tape, which she describes as the single most painful and violating experience of her life. Hilton was only 19 when it was filmed; she was a child in love and trusting someone older, only to be sexualized and verbally abused by adults all over the world. Today, this behavior wouldn't be tolerated and would likely result in jail time for the perpetrator, but in the early 2000s, the media landscape was different.

Paris Hilton wished to be seen as an elegant figure, like Princess Diana, but she feels her chance was taken away from her by the public humiliation she endured. She told Jay Shetty that she chose to revisit this trauma in her documentary because she wanted to let others know they are not alone and that shame belongs to the abuser, not the victim. Hilton found it empowering to let go of that internalized shame and is now using her voice to fight for laws that protect women from similar violations.

The "Dumb Blonde" Persona as Armor

After going through all forms of trauma in her teens, Paris Hilton built an armor in the form of the "dumb blonde" persona. She told Jay Shetty that, by creating an alter ego, she no longer felt like people were laughing at her directly, but at the character she had created. To her, it was a shield that kept everyone from seeing her internalized pain during a time when mental health was not yet part of the mass vocabulary.

Even though Hilton created a public persona and hid her true self behind it, it came at a cost; she admitted to Jay Shetty that it was easier to laugh through the pain than sit with it and feel it. While people saw her as a party girl, she was, in fact, painfully shy, and the discrepancy between her public image and true self was becoming increasingly difficult to bear. However, when she appeared on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, Paris Hilton felt like she was finally taking her power back, and that was just the beginning of her healing journey.

A Happy Family

For a long time, Paris Hilton believed she would be single forever because she couldn't trust anyone anymore. But it all changed when she met Carter Reum in 2019. She told Jay Shetty that Reum was the first person she had truly shown her real self to. Hilton believes that her documentary and healing work helped her break the wall around her heart and prepare her to love again.

Motherhood has brought a new level of happiness to Paris Hilton's life. She told Jay Shetty that her children are her two best friends, and she strives to give them a fun, safe life, where they always feel comfortable talking to her about anything. Looking back, Hilton believes she has manifested the life she is living today, and jokingly said she no longer knows what else to wish for when she sees 11:11 on the clock.

Philanthropy and Helping Others

When the wildfires devastated Los Angeles in 2025, Paris Hilton watched her own home burn down on the news. Despite her loss, she immediately dedicated her time to saving others, raising over $1.5 million, providing hotel rooms for displaced families, and helping reunite lost pets with their owners. Her non-profit organization, 11:11 Impact, is dedicated to driving meaningful, lasting change in the world.

Hilton also talked to Jay Shetty about her work in Washington D.C., where she helped pass a federal bill to protect children in residential treatment facilities and also helped change laws in 15 states. 

Looking back, she is proud of the woman she has become, living a life her younger self wouldn't have thought possible. Her advice to the audience is to remember that they can survive anything if they have heart and lead with kindness, because "kindness is iconic."

More From Jay Shetty

Listen to the entire On Purpose with Jay Shetty podcast episode “PARIS HILTON: The REAL Story Beyond the Headlines, Fame, Misconceptions, and The Journey to FINALLY Reclaim Her Narrative” now in the iTunes store or on Spotify. For more inspirational stories and messages like this, check out Jay’s website at jayshetty.me.